I used to think sexual lubricant was a take-it-or-leave-it kind of thing, probably because my first encounter with lube was quite unpleasant. When I was 15, my first-ever boyfriend brought over a bottle in a desperate attempt to convince me to do butt stuff. It also created a subtle burning sensation in my vulva. For years, that was that: I figured all lubes must suck. What's more, there were a lot of good lubes out there.
In one of the most memorable scenes of the film Brokeback Mountain, Heath Ledger's character uses his own spit to lube up his dick before he penetrates Jake Gyllenhaal. The characters are caught in a furtive moment without lube which, in the chronology of the film, might have been simply K-Y Jelly , but they cannot hold back their desire. Here, the act of using saliva as lube represents both passion and primality. These cowboys have given themselves over to the heat of the moment, and their own bodily fluid lubricates the gears of their desire. Yes, there's a romanticization of spit fucking in the gay community which probably far precedes Brokeback Mountain. San Francisco-based Mr. S Leather, an adult entertainment store, sells a product called Spit Lube H2O that has the look and feel of thick, stringy saliva.
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Of all the sex acts out there you can try, anal sex comes with some of the most vicious rumors. I don't just mean the rumor that everyone said Stephanie from high school was doing it, or the weird, creeping thought that all your friends are secretly doing it behind your back pun intended. I mean the rumor that it's always painful, but if you want to try it, you just sort of have to put up with it and dive into butt stuff, head- or I guess ass- first. And then you just deal with all the insane injuries that happen later. Some good news though.