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Now, right off, I feel the need to defend Ms. Alba, who, at least in my dealings with her, does not immediately associate alcohol consumption with the removal of clothing. She will happily substitute food. For instance: The day before the actress and I were to meet for dinner in L. The next evening, over our dessert—a brown-butter quince tart paired with a panna cotta flapjack—Alba made sure to clear up any lingering ambiguity from our phone conversation. Alba wore a slinky, luminescent blouse that revealed her slender mocha-hued shoulders, and her natural-brown hair was dyed a cinematic blond.

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It's worth noting that Alba and I are not taking a break from picketing a Hormel plant, but sitting in the back of Sur La Table, the gourmet kitchenware store, near the Farmers Market in Los Angeles. We've just completed a private class in Mediterranean cooking, and those tender lamb kebabs dipped in pomegranate sauce sitting in our bellies are now conjuring visions of a woolly creature rolling around a pasture in a wheelchair. But Alba resides in a pragmatic world. When it came down to it, however cruel and toxic the meal, she did exactly what was expected with a writer and cooking teacher eyeballing her: She ate the goddamn food, and even managed to pronounce it "delicious. Alba has for some time been publicly chafing at her image as a staggeringly beautiful girl who lands atop any poll that measures men's arousal but has never attracted critical adulation for her acting.
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It is written for the enjoyment of those who read erotic material and I do not make any money from writing it. This story is inspired by Sean Renauld's series 'Starlets to Sluts', which in turn was inspired by shadowblaze18's 'Red Carpet Facials'. Similarities are intentional and meant as a tribute to a couple of good stories.
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